Allow me to preface this by saying that my husband is a great man. he doesn't go out and party. he doesn't force me to stay home with the kids. he never spend his paycheck on anything that is not needed. He isn't a bad husband and defiantly not a bad father. What he is, is a MAN!!!
The one thing that he lacks in is the ability to comprehend my day to day life. He seems to be under the impression that a magic fairy comes and cleans our house and takes care of the kids while i sit on my butt all day, on the computer or watching TV, essentially doing nothing. If only this were true. If only i had Tinker Bell in my back pocket and could wait til he tip toes out the door at 6:30 am for work to let her out and do her JOB!
Alas this is not the case. When he leaves so early in the morning for work i manage to get the kids to sleep till a very late 8am and then i am up. I do take the first 2 hours of my morning, after i fix the kids breakfast, to check my email and all the blogs that i read, along with my myspace. Then i usually send the next 3 to 5 hours cleaning, cooking, playing with kids, and even more cleaning. Finally around 5 or 6 i get to sit down and watch a little TV before i am back up to fix dinner for my hungry brood of boys.
Now where this "Yesterday" comes in is here. Friday night, as we laid in bed talking, my dear sweet husband and i got into a fight about the kitchen. We have had an agreement, since before we were married, that i so not do kitchens. I cook and i do not feel that i should have to do everything in this house. I clean everything else there for we agreed that cleaning the kitchen (which consists of washing dishes, wiping off the counters, and vacuuming the floor [the house we rent for some god awful reason has carpet in the kitchen and bathroom]) is his one job. I do not expect him to do anything else after he gets home from work. Better yet let me explain his day to you.
My husband works at Chili's (For those of you not familiar it is a chain restaurant that serves baby back ribs among other foods). He goes in between 6 and 7 am and usually gets off between 3 and 5 pm 5 days a week. After he gets home he checks his myspace, reads the paper, and plays with the kids while i cook dinner (if i wanted to bitch about this it would be another entry because that is another responsibility of his to keep the kids out of the kitchen while i am cooking). He gives the kids a bath after dinner and then we sing them a few songs or read to them and tuck them in for the night. After that if football is on he does that. If i am watching TV he plays his x-box, or plays on the computer. Now somewhere in here he is suppose to do the dishes. It never happens. NEVER!!!
The reason we argued Friday night was this; there were no clean dishes. Not one clean pot, clean fork, or clean dish to eat off of. I can not cook dinner if i have no clean dishes. So we fought and i went to bed mad. Apparently he doesn't care if i just hand the kids a box of cereal and tell them to eat straight out of the box because we have no clean bowls.
Anyways i spent 3 1/2 hours yesterday washing dishes and cleaning the kitchen (yes that is how dirty it was and that is actually how long it took me to clean it). He worked late not getting off til 6:30 then decided it was ok to go to a friends house for 1 1/2 hours (which by the time he got home it was 8 and dinner was ready not to mention this is way out of character for him to do this with out calling me). When he got home and entered the kitchen a look of shock came over his face and then he began to pout. Like i had stolen his puppy he pouted because i had cleaned the kitchen instead of waiting on him to get off his lazy ass and do it.
So i remained silent to him till the kids were in bed and then when we went to bed i rolled over to go to sleep because i have a bad back and it was now in excruciating pain because of 3 1/2 hours of leaning over a sink. He finally after 15 minutes turned his back to me and told me "I love you" and i said "i know you do".
Now what followed was me losing my temper and being pissed. He then proceeded to keep his back turned to me as he said "I am sorry and i know that doesn't mean anything anymore cause i say it to much but i am sorry". I nicely as possible in yet a screaming whisper told him that if he was sorry he sure as hell didn't act like it. And i went to bed.
Now i am sure i have left a lot of the conversation out and i am sure there are two sides to every story but this is my blog damn it and i will write what i want. I think i deserve after all i do (not tinker bell) for him to do the one thing i ask of him. Clean the damn kitchen. Wash the damn dishes. That is all i ask and i don't think i am asking too much!!!!!!!!!!