Sunday, September 4, 2011

Hilarious Despiration

The following is an email i recieved a few days ago. I thought it was so hilarious that i needed to share it with you. What makes it that much more entertaining is that i am sure i have all of about 3 followers since i dont update my blog on a consistent basis right now. Too good not to share.



Hello!

I'm so glad that someone else reads books :) I found The Da Vinci Code in your profile, it is one of my favorite ones! By the way, I do not know if you read Twilight Series, I can recommend it to you, I think you should like it.

I just want to thank you for your wonderful blog chaosisus.blogspot.com.

I read the first post "Worries " and then I spent another hour on your blog by reading your posts with pleasure :) Every article is interesting and easy to read. I really like the "Dirt and Snails and Puppy Dog... ".

By the way, I also read similar blog to yours - Link to another blog, I am sure you will find it interesting too.

I work for Random company name, we aggregate job adverts around the world.

My job is to persuade bloggers to link to our site.

I really love my job! We have a friendly team and good management, but unfortunately I have no idea how to convince a blogger to link to us, I'm afraid I might lose my job because of it :(

And that is why, instead of sending letters to thousands of different blogs, I am reading yours.

Honestly, I am not really sure if the link to our website in USA -Link to web site, will be appropriate for your blog, but if you believe it will and it is possible to add it, I would be really grateful to you! Our site is really cool, it can greatly help hundreds of people to find a job.

I wish you to have a good day and excellent mood! Thanks again for your nice blog. Write more! Thanks!

P.S. I am a Aquarius by zodiac sign too :)

Best regards,

Serge Lavange
Account Manager

Tel: Randone out of country number
E-mail: Random email address
Skype: Random Skype Acct
Random website again
 
PS. I changed and took out all the companys links to their pages, email accts, and such because frankly they dont deserve a link up after this stupid email.

Sunday, August 14, 2011

Worries

Its been a wild few weeks.

A lot of stress.

A few tears.

And one overall breakdown.

Lets begin here.

I got a job. A real out of the house, kids at a sitter, on my feet all day job.

It was time. I didn't really want to. I enjoy(ed) being a stay at home mom. Loved it. Cherished it. But the money struggles were just too much. It was past time maybe.

With a jib came the mommy guilt. I don't want someone else raising my kids. I don't want to miss events and school functions. I don't want my kids to miss me. But we are working on the schedule and sooner or later we will get use to it. It is just hard.

I wont say where but I'm waiting tables. Having cash in hand can be very addictive ya know. So it is fun but challenging to deal with all the different personalities I encounter. Plus being on your feet all day sucks. But the money makes our life easier. So I guess it balances out.

Our van battery died. Thanks to a dear friend we got a new one but then our speedometer died. So now we are using our GPS to tell us how fast we are going. Its a little off I think but only in the sense that its says your going faster then you really are so not a big big deal.

I have something else really stressful going on but wont be talking about that til I know what's going on. Just please keep me and my family in your prayers. We don't need any more stress right now. It isn't anything really serious (like life or death) just worrysome and scary.

The kids are great. Football season is in full swing. School is almost half way through their first semester. Sione is teething (booooo).

Life is moving along.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

I'm Learning...

I have a friend, really a best friend, that makes hemp jewelry. She made me a necklace while my arm was broken. It was oh so very pretty.

I commented one day that once I got my cast off I'd like to learn how to make then. And so I did.

I made myself an ankle bracelet yesterday. It took me almost 2 hours. Most people probably could have done it in 30 minutes or less.

I don't have much strenghth in my left hand now and my coordination is all messed up. But my physical therapist says that this will be a good exercise for me. It will help with both strength and coordination.

So I'm learning this new skill. And its fun. And I get to have pretty things in the end. Who knows maybe I will open an etsy shop if I get good enough. Anyone think they would be interested in buying a hemp item (necklace, bracelet, anklet, keychain etc)?



Saturday, July 2, 2011

Marriage Counceling

(Did I spell that right? Cause I don't think I did.)

So this post doesn't have anything to do with my husband and my relationship. We are just fine thankyouverymuch!

This is about a possible future for me. A perfession I have been told time and time again I would be excellant at.

I'm not certain about it but apparently others think I would make a perfect marriage/relationship councelor (still don't feel right).

I am always talking with friends and giving guidence. I am always ask how I have such a successful marriage. I usually look at people crazy when they give me that comment.

The truth is my marriage is anything but perfect. We are human and imperfect by nature. No one has the "perfect" relationship. It isn't realistic to even think its possible.

What I do have is a functional relationship. We work hard at it to. There are days where we probably don't even want to see each other but we grin and bare it to push past it.

We talk a lot (well I talk a lot. He's a man therefore by nature not an emotional sharer). We communicate. And most importantly we never go to bed mad with one another.

Going to bed mad = waking up still mad or worse.

This is the same advice I pass on to others when ask. Honesty, trust, communication, and understanding are the keys to happiness. It takes work. And sometimes your going to get your feelings hurt because, guess what, sometimes the truth hurts.

I don't think this qualifies me as a good counselor, but I guess if I go back to school anytime soon I atleast have a field of interest.

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

Where Is My Baby?

Have you seen my baby? He seems to have vanished.

In his place I have a toddler who is now sleeping in a toddler bed. Who is starting to potty train. Who doesn't want to spend his days cuddling with mama.

If you happen to see my baby boy, can you tell him that his mama misses him.


Saturday, June 25, 2011

Dirt and Snails and Puppy Dog...

About a month ago we adopted a puppy. He is part Chihuahua part weiner dog. And a whole lot of cute. We named him Odie.

It has been a rough start. Because of his nature he isn't always kid friendly. The kids are having to learn when to play with him and when to leave him alone. But most of all they are learning responsibility.

They do well with helping to train and walk him. Its a process like any other but I'm proud none the less. My boys are growing up.


Monday, May 9, 2011

Its Been Awhile...

Hi ya'll! I swear i am still live and movin around but life seems to be getting in a lazy/hectic pattern here lately. I know that is kinda an oximoron of sorts but thats how i feel. We seem to have a few really busy weeks followed by a few really slow lazy days and it is leaving me feeling like i am on a rollar coaster.
I suppose maybe you all would like to know how we are doing here in the House of Chaos, so i think i will just give you an all around update.

MJ turned 5 last month. Somehow in all the hooplah of parties and getting ready for a family reunion i dont think i took the time to truly appreciate the gravity of his turning 5. He has officially moved out of the preschooler catagory and into the world of big boys. He will start kindergarten in July and then i will no longer have my days filled with boys. It will just be Sione' and I at home until 3.

I think MJ is ready for school in a lot of aspects but i still worry about his emotional readiness. How can i say this without sounding horrible? MJ is a bit of an emotional child. He whines a lot, and cries even more often. His pre-k teacher says he isnt like that at school but i worry that a new teacher and a new school will be a lot for him to handle. MJ is a creature of routine. He likes things to be just such and when things change or are not as he likes them or remembers them to be he gets very upset. I just hope we can make the transition without too much havoc.

He has also decided, after almost 4 years of obsession, that he doesnt like Cars (aka Lightenin McQueen) anymore. Toy Story is now his new obsession (although Cars is still a everyday presence). He got a lot of TS3 stuff for his birthday and was more than estatic about it.

Phabian...oh my dear sweet Phabian. Where do i begin?

First let me say he is 6! 6!!!! When did these kids start growing so fast? He will start 1st grade in July. He is reading like a pro now. he can sound out most words but still gets a little flustered with longer words. He loves math and reading and is doing great with spelling as well. He got 100% on his first 3 spelling tests and i couldnt be more proud of him!

Oh the other side of wonderful you have attitude! He has developed a very smart mouth along with his very smart brain. He has become very disrespectful at times and we are working hard to get back on track. He is however doing better behaving at school.

He is loving girls right now. He says he has a few girls at school that have a crush on him and they chase him during recess. He just smiles big and tells you its because he is cute. Modesty...what is that? He also loves his super heros. He is just really mostly into reading and writing right now. Who knows maybe i have a author on my hands.

Sione' is going through a rough time right now. Well really it has been a rough month which have resulted in a really whiny, needy, and up my butt toddler.

It started at the beginning of April when he somehow contracted Hand, Foot, and Mouth Disease. I dont know if anyone of your kids has ever had this but it completely, utterly sucks! He had a really low grade fever for a few days which we contributed to teething but then on the 3rd day it spiked to 103 and off to the ER we went. After the diagnosis we were told to go home and wait it out.

He slept about 20 hrs a day for 4 days and finally the bug kicked rocks and gave me my baby back. Unfortunatly it gave him back still teething which is not fun for anyone. He is still (now in May) trying to cut his canines. He is clingy, miserable, and just not an overall happy baby.

On the other had he is learning leaps and bounds. He has learned about 12 new words just this week including brush, keys, teeth, car, dog, and yummy. I cant believe he is 18 months old. 1.5 years i have had this precious little joy in my life. I am so truly blessed.

My poor husband has been working about 60 hours a week and it is making it hard on all of us. He is exhausted, the kids and i miss him so much. With only 1 day a week off it is straining us all. I wish i could do something but until July my hands are kinda tied.

In July 2 of my 3 kids will be in school full time. That means i will only need to find daycare for 1 and then i can get a job. I am still very hesitant to put my kids in daycare but the time has come and we need the money. I need to help my husband so he doesnt have to work so much. He misses us as much as we miss him and we need the time together.

So for now we are holding it together. Life is unfolding and we are blessed. God has given us each other and together we will make it through what ever storms plaque us.

Saturday, April 2, 2011

Sometimes

Sometimes bedtime doesn't come fast enough.
Sometimes I think I make more mistakes then I do things right.
Sometimes I feel depressed.
Sometimes I feel so so sad.
Sometimes I think I am unwanted...unloved.
Sometimes life gets me so down that I doubt my ability to get back up.
Sometimes I fail.
Sometimes I smile.
Sometimes I am happy.
Sometimes I feel alone.
Sometimes I feel oh so lucky.
Sometimes I want to run away.
Sometimes thing are so very wonderful.
Sometimes they are not.
Sometimes.......

Then there is now.

Monday, March 28, 2011

What To Say

I have been feeling very blah here lately.

I was sick all this past week. I has strep throat which I haven't had since I was like 10. Then when that let up my allergies kicked in and I got all sinus infectionie.

I feel very removed right now. I have been withdrawing recently. Kind of sequestering myself. Lets call it self-quarenteening.

I was sick so I put myself in my room and shut the door. My Hubby who is the best man ever took care of me. Now I am better and I just don't want to come back out.

Maybe it is the after sickness blues. Maybe it is just laziness. I don't really know.

In the mean time I am trying to indulge in the below.







Saturday, March 12, 2011

Night Like Tonight

We have a pretty consistent schedule in our house. The kids are up around 6 or 7 am and in bed no later then 8. Every other night my husband and I switch duties of either singing or tucking. And then he sits outside the bedroom til Sioné is fast asleep. 2-3 nights a week I do the sitting and almost always at nap time.

Tonight however is my night and I am despising it. Hubby is working his late shift. The big kids are in my room watching UP. I am still trying to get bratbaby (do you like my new nickname for the chubster?) to go to sleep.

I want to rip my hair out. 2 HOURS!!!!!!! And he is still talking to me. I just wanna go watch the movie with Phabian and MJ.

OK I'm done...

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Alive

I have been busy with life.

Not anything extravagant but just life with three kids and a husband.

And ya know what its good. Life is good!

The kids got a bunk bed yesterday. Its nice and I love it. They love it. It gives them more space in their room and it has drawers in the steps for added storage space. Its a winner all around.

My Hubby and I have been working on some minor (and I do mean minor) issues we have been having in our relationship. Without going into details it is thing like time management, alone time, and intimacy. I think things all marriages go through when u have been married for almost 7 years.

But I am lucky because we are very open with one another. We are able to easily talk about everything without holding back because of fear. We have decent communication besides the normal man to woman translation. You know men and women say the same thing but interprete words very differently.

The kids are doing great. MJ is nearing pre-k graduation. I can't believe how fast this year has flown. Phabian is almost done with kindergarten which is insane.

I am happy to report Phabian has been doing much better at school. I am not sure what changed but we have been trying to give more positive rewards and it seems to be working. So far so good.

Sioné is growing way too fast. He is 16 months old almost. He is so big...literally. he is 31 inches tall and 27 pounds. Bigger then either of his brothers at this age. I am enjoying every moment of him being this age. I know too soon it will be gone.

And me...well...I'm still working on me. It is a constant improvement and work or art. Like a panting that is ever changing and developing. My temper is getting better and I wish I could say my tolerence was getting better but as I said...work in progress right here.

So yea. Life is good. I have a beautiful family. Great friends. And does it get any better than that?







Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Time

It keeps going. No matter what I do. No matter where I go. It just keeps ticking on.

My kids are growing up. They are getting bigger both physically and mentally. I am wondering now how to protect them.

There are a lot of things they need protecting from in the world. There is also that fine line between when to step in and when to step back.

Phabian is starting to hear things from other kids. Things we have not talked about yet. Things I don't even know how to begin to address with a almost 6 year old.

I knew the day would come when the "talk" would be had. I even knew it was coming fast. I however wasn't prepared when Phabian came home from school the other day and told me that a friend was telling him about a girl that "sexed" him.

I just stared blank faced along with my husband. I knew Phabian was waiting on a response but I was stunned.

Then my husband and I almost synchronized said what does sexed mean.

Phabian said it meant the girl took his shirt off. Then he ran off to play. We were left breathing a sigh of relief but still knowing it was time for that "talk" to be had.

This is where we are now...how? What? Who?

Should his father and I approach the subject with him together or just one of us? Should we include MJ in the talk since he starts kindergarten in July or wait til a different, but inevitable, time approaches? How much is too much information for a 6 year old? And how do we express to him that this is something to be discussed at home and not at school?

I feel adrift in a storm. I knew it was coming so why are we so unprepared?

Any help is appreciated and needed. I am soliciting advice. Books, shows, anything to help us along.

Tell me your stories cause I really need the help.

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Today

Today started out really...well...crappy. That is the only way to describe it.

The kids got up at 6am cranky and mad. Sioné was screaming his lungs out for no apparent reason. I spilled a whole cup of scolding hot coffee on my foot. It was all crappy.

Then as if my prayers had been heard, Sioné calmed down. I got the boys off to school. We went to Kmart so I could get Marcus a Valentine's Day present (wink wink). And then Sioné and I came home and had breakfast.

It got better. It will get better.

Tomorrow is my birthday. Half way to 50 and don't even have half the answers. But what I do know now is that is actually okay to not have them. And maybe that is the best answer to know.





Sunday, February 6, 2011

Monday, January 17, 2011

MLK's I Have A Dream

I am happy to join with you today in what will go down in history as the greatest demonstration for freedom in the history of our nation.


Five score years ago, a great American, in whose symbolic shadow we stand today, signed the Emancipation Proclamation. This momentous decree came as a great beacon light of hope to millions of Negro slaves who had been seared in the flames of withering injustice. It came as a joyous daybreak to end the long night of their captivity.

But one hundred years later, the Negro still is not free. One hundred years later, the life of the Negro is still sadly crippled by the manacles of segregation and the chains of discrimination. One hundred years later, the Negro lives on a lonely island of poverty in the midst of a vast ocean of material prosperity. One hundred years later, the Negro is still languishing in the corners of American society and finds himself an exile in his own land. So we have come here today to dramatize a shameful condition.

In a sense we have come to our nation's capital to cash a check. When the architects of our republic wrote the magnificent words of the Constitution and the Declaration of Independence, they were signing a promissory note to which every American was to fall heir. This note was a promise that all men, yes, black men as well as white men, would be guaranteed the unalienable rights of life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.

It is obvious today that America has defaulted on this promissory note insofar as her citizens of color are concerned. Instead of honoring this sacred obligation, America has given the Negro people a bad check, a check which has come back marked "insufficient funds." But we refuse to believe that the bank of justice is bankrupt. We refuse to believe that there are insufficient funds in the great vaults of opportunity of this nation. So we have come to cash this check — a check that will give us upon demand the riches of freedom and the security of justice. We have also come to this hallowed spot to remind America of the fierce urgency of now. This is no time to engage in the luxury of cooling off or to take the tranquilizing drug of gradualism. Now is the time to make real the promises of democracy. Now is the time to rise from the dark and desolate valley of segregation to the sunlit path of racial justice. Now is the time to lift our nation from the quick sands of racial injustice to the solid rock of brotherhood. Now is the time to make justice a reality for all of God's children.

It would be fatal for the nation to overlook the urgency of the moment. This sweltering summer of the Negro's legitimate discontent will not pass until there is an invigorating autumn of freedom and equality. Nineteen sixty-three is not an end, but a beginning. Those who hope that the Negro needed to blow off steam and will now be content will have a rude awakening if the nation returns to business as usual. There will be neither rest nor tranquility in America until the Negro is granted his citizenship rights. The whirlwinds of revolt will continue to shake the foundations of our nation until the bright day of justice emerges.

But there is something that I must say to my people who stand on the warm threshold which leads into the palace of justice. In the process of gaining our rightful place we must not be guilty of wrongful deeds. Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred.

We must forever conduct our struggle on the high plane of dignity and discipline. We must not allow our creative protest to degenerate into physical violence. Again and again we must rise to the majestic heights of meeting physical force with soul force. The marvelous new militancy which has engulfed the Negro community must not lead us to a distrust of all white people, for many of our white brothers, as evidenced by their presence here today, have come to realize that their destiny is tied up with our destiny. They have come to realize that their freedom is inextricably bound to our freedom. We cannot walk alone.

As we walk, we must make the pledge that we shall always march ahead. We cannot turn back. There are those who are asking the devotees of civil rights, "When will you be satisfied?" We can never be satisfied as long as the Negro is the victim of the unspeakable horrors of police brutality. We can never be satisfied, as long as our bodies, heavy with the fatigue of travel, cannot gain lodging in the motels of the highways and the hotels of the cities. We cannot be satisfied as long as the Negro's basic mobility is from a smaller ghetto to a larger one. We can never be satisfied as long as our children are stripped of their selfhood and robbed of their dignity by signs stating "For Whites Only". We cannot be satisfied as long as a Negro in Mississippi cannot vote and a Negro in New York believes he has nothing for which to vote. No, no, we are not satisfied, and we will not be satisfied until justice rolls down like waters and righteousness like a mighty stream.

I am not unmindful that some of you have come here out of great trials and tribulations. Some of you have come fresh from narrow jail cells. Some of you have come from areas where your quest for freedom left you battered by the storms of persecution and staggered by the winds of police brutality. You have been the veterans of creative suffering. Continue to work with the faith that unearned suffering is redemptive.

Go back to Mississippi, go back to Alabama, go back to South Carolina, go back to Georgia, go back to Louisiana, go back to the slums and ghettos of our northern cities, knowing that somehow this situation can and will be changed. Let us not wallow in the valley of despair.

I say to you today, my friends, so even though we face the difficulties of today and tomorrow, I still have a dream. It is a dream deeply rooted in the American dream.

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out the true meaning of its creed: "We hold these truths to be self-evident: that all men are created equal."

I have a dream that one day on the red hills of Georgia the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood.

I have a dream that one day even the state of Mississippi, a state sweltering with the heat of injustice, sweltering with the heat of oppression, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice.

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day, down in Alabama, with its vicious racists, with its governor having his lips dripping with the words of interposition and nullification; one day right there in Alabama, little black boys and black girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day every valley shall be exalted, every hill and mountain shall be made low, the rough places will be made plain, and the crooked places will be made straight, and the glory of the Lord shall be revealed, and all flesh shall see it together.

This is our hope. This is the faith that I go back to the South with. With this faith we will be able to hew out of the mountain of despair a stone of hope. With this faith we will be able to transform the jangling discords of our nation into a beautiful symphony of brotherhood. With this faith we will be able to work together, to pray together, to struggle together, to go to jail together, to stand up for freedom together, knowing that we will be free one day.

This will be the day when all of God's children will be able to sing with a new meaning, "My country, 'tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing. Land where my fathers died, land of the pilgrim's pride, from every mountainside, let freedom ring."

And if America is to be a great nation this must become true. So let freedom ring from the prodigious hilltops of New Hampshire. Let freedom ring from the mighty mountains of New York. Let freedom ring from the heightening Alleghenies of Pennsylvania!

Let freedom ring from the snowcapped Rockies of Colorado!

Let freedom ring from the curvaceous slopes of California!

But not only that; let freedom ring from Stone Mountain of Georgia!

Let freedom ring from Lookout Mountain of Tennessee!

Let freedom ring from every hill and molehill of Mississippi. From every mountainside, let freedom ring.

And when this happens, when we allow freedom to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when all of God's children, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, will be able to join hands and sing in the words of the old Negro spiritual, "Free at last! free at last! thank God Almighty, we are free at last!"
I just want to take the time today to be thankful for Dr. Martin Luther King. Because of this man, and so many other who joined his movement and beliefs, I have the best husband in the whole world. I have 3 beautiful bi-racial children. He gave his life so people like me and my husband could live our lives free of chains.

After reading this speech over and over for years it still brings tears to my eyes and makes my heart sore. The words still ring true today and apply today. So many others are using these words today to still fight for the rights that are due to every human being.

Thank you Dr. Martin Luther King. Thank you for fighting the good fight. Thank you for giving your life so that my children will know and have a better life. Thank you.

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Apprehension

This Friday, in 5 days, i will be attending a girl retreat, for 3 days, with a bunch of friends.

There is 10 of us who have rented out a cabin in North Carolina.

There will be wine, mixed drinks, food, a fire, a hot tube, probably snow, and definitely good conversation.

There will not be men, kids, drama, yelling, screaming, fighting, or saying no a million times a day.

However, i am feeling a bit of anxiety and apprehension about going.

Hubby gave me the ok and go ahead a few months ago when the trip was first being planned. He has taken the whole weekend off to have a boys time while i am gone. He plans on having fun with his kids and enjoying the time off.

I am happy for him. He works so much and he deserves time off to spend with his kids. However i am still nervous and apprehensive.

The last time i went out of town for 4 days i came back to some bad news. Phabian had almost drowned. Yes everything turned out great in the end and no one was harmed in the long term, but it still doesn't help the fear i have of leaving my kids again. That was the first time i had ever left my kids for more then 24 hours. And something terrible almost happened.

Here i am leaving again. This time for 3 days. Really not even that. We are leaving Friday around 10 am and will be back probably around 6 pm Sunday.

I am nervous. Sick to my stomach with anxiety. I keep trying to tell myself it is all ok. Nothing is going to go wrong this time. I deserve a break and i shouldn't be so worried about taking the opportunity. I just don't want my fear and apprehension to interfere with me having a great time.

I need to come to terms with the fact that my kids will be ok with out me. Their Dad is very capable of taking great care of them. But in the back of my mind i wonder if he is feeling as nervous as i am. Is he thinking about the last time like i am? Does he doubt his ability to keep the kids safe? I don't. It is just my over protective mommy instincts that whisper to me at night, "no one can take care of then as good as you", "no one can keep them as safe as you", "no one can comfort them like you".

Then i wonder if my kids remember when i went last summer for 4 days. I mean i know Sione' doesn't but do MJ and Phabian remember. Will they be upset when i leave. Does Phabian trust that he will be safe while i am gone. It is just frustrating to  have these things circling in my head.

I DO know that my husband is more then capable of taking care of our kids. I DO know that he wouldn't let anything happen to them as long as it can be avoided. I DO trust him with all my being. BUT it still doesn't stop the anxiety.

Sunday, January 2, 2011

New Blog

I started a new blog just for pictures. I will be taking (or trying to atleast) a picture a day to post there. It is called 365 - Photos of My Babies.

I started with today so i suppose it is really 364 for this year lol.

Anyways just wanted to let those of you who read know. I dont often post a lot of pictures here anymore so i figured this would give you all a chance to see the boys.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Be Here...Be Aware...Be Me

So i say this every year but i am going to say it again. I HATE resolutions.

I don't make them because, as a people, we hardly ever keep them and then we make ourselves feel like failures because we didn't do what we set out to accomplish.

So once again i don't really set out with goals for the new year but just a better outlook.

I have learned lessons good and bad over the last year. I would like to think i have grown from my mistakes. But their is always room for improvement.

And boy oh boy do i need improvement.

So this year all i want to focus on is life. Living it. Breathing it. Being present in the moment. Letting life follow the course it is suppose to for me. Making and holding onto those memories that are made in the moments that we sometimes let slip by unnoticed.

This year is about learning myself inside and out. Being the very best me i can be. If i am giving my best then i cant possibly feel like i failed right? We will see how it goes.

I know there will be ups and downs. Good days and bad. Sunshine and rain. But as long as i am giving my all, through it all, everything should be right in my little corner of the world.

So here is to another year in the life. My life. My kids lives. My husband's life. Our lives.

Happy New Year. May you find what you are searching for this year.