Friday, February 20, 2009

Get To Know The Whiner

This is the post where you get to know the whining not so attractive me! I just need to get this off my chest and whine to someone who isn't family or IRL friend!

As i tried to clear my reader today i noticed a trend. A lot of my bloggy friends are pregnant! Now before i commence my whining i would like to give a big congrats to Elaine @ The Miss Elaine-ous Life who just announced her pregnancy! I hope you have a healthy and happy pregnancy!

Now let the whining begin!

As most of you all know by now we are TTC! We started this new journey on Jan 13th and i had hoped that by now i would have great news to share. Now i know that it can take awhile to get pregnant but i was hoping out past would have a commonality with out present.

It only took me about a month and a half to get pregnant with Phabian and a month to get pregnant with MJ. I am blessed with healthy reproductive organs and the ability to carry a child. I know this is a blessing (especially now) as i read so many stories on other blogs about the hurt and pain they have suffered through infertility. But gosh dern it i am getting impatient!

it seems like every time i open my reader and get to read through the 100 post that build up over night i find out someone else is pregnant and guess what, it isn't me! I took my first PG test on Feb 8th which was exactly 4 calender weeks since we started trying. Now i take one ever Sunday til i get a positive. It is a little depressing to take test that you constantly fail so to speak.

I desperately want that positive little pink plus sign, or 2 lines, or even a digital your pregnant! I know, my heart knows, that God will bless me when the time is right and that all good things are worth waiting for and so on and so one but can someone please tell that to my ever impatient baby craving brain!!!

It is like my brain is in baby mode and every time the pregnancy test says nope not yet my brain has a anxiety attack and a million questions run through my head. Did my IUD cause damage? Will i be the 1 in 100 women that can't conceive after having the IUD removed? Am i doing something wrong? Am i exercising too much? Should i stop trying to lose weight? These are all things i think about and it drives me nuts cause this is just not me.

So there it is! I am so happy for all of my blog friends that are having little bundles of joy and i wish them all nothing but the best. Now i am left wondering is it my turn yet?


Brittany said...

Oh gosh Im sorry hun...I am like you and I am super easy to get pregnant. I was talking to my mom before I got pregnant and was telling her how badly I wanted to have a baby and every couple of weeks I would take at test hoping Brandon had knocked me up and sure enough it was negative everytime...and finally my mom said just relax and stop stressing about it and it will happen and what do ya know a month later there was that positive sign. So thats my advice lol just don't think about it(which is HARD I know) and I think you will be blessed with a little bundle of joy (hopefully a girl !!!) very soon !

Jen @ Rolling Through Looneyville said...

Ugh! This is so hard, no matter how fast (or slow!) your pregnancies before happened.

I've been there with both of my first two and know what you're going through!

Relax if you can! (That's like telling you not to breathe, I know)