Monday, March 23, 2009

Panic Mode Already (UBP)

Ultimate Blog Party 2009

If you haven't hear yet we are partying all week long over at 5 Minutes for Mom (5MFM). There are lots of prizes to be won and plently of blogs to visit so get your butts over there and get busy. If you would like to see my original introduction post i would be happy to oblidge and i ahev once again added a Mr. Linky so sign away when you visit today.

I have entered a new stage in my only 8 week pregnancy. I am in panic mode and i haven't even made it out of the 1st trimester yet. I keep thinking about all the stuff that i really need and how i want things to be done this time around. It is a nerve racking thing. It is like we are starting over from scratch except this time i already know how to care for a baby.

Lets start with stuff that i actually need for a baby. I have given away everything i had for the boys. I mean MJ will be 3 1/2 by the time this baby is born so there was really no need for me to keep all the stuff i had. So i have a long list of stuff that i will have to buy or receive (via a baby shower of course) before this baby is born. Would you like to see the list? Sure you would so here we go in bullet form cause i am just cool like that.
  • Crib (which can wait till we move cause we don't have a bedroom for it to go in)
  • Crib Bedding (same applies as above)
  • Diaper Bag (to put all the stuff in)
  • Bottles (in case breastfeeding fails for a 3rd time)
  • Sling (because i wanna be a baby wearer)
  • Cloth Diapers (i wanna give it a try at least)
  • Clothes (boy or girl we have nothing)
  • Breast Pump (in case BFing fails and i still want to pump for at least the first few weeks)
  • Pacifiers (this is not a choice as much as a sanity equalizer)
  • Bath Tub (cause who wants a dirty stinky baby)
  • Bassinet (in lou of a crib for the first few months)
  • Bouncey (cause no baby wants to lay around all the time in a bassinet)
  • Swing (for same above said reason plus its a great sleep inducing tool)
  • Car Seat/Travel System
Now this is just a rough list as i know there are probably other things i forgot to add. If you have any ideas please feel free to inform me of your favorite baby products and needs. I learned a lot from my first 2 kids as to what is necessity and what is just first time mommy must haves.

I fully plan on breast feeding but as i learned from my first 2 babies that isn't always in the cards. I really do hope it is this time. I always was a little down on myself for not being able to make it work, but i have 2 healthy boys to show for the troubles.

As said above we need a crib but wont be buying one till after we move at the beginning of next year. Right now we live in a small 2 bedroom house and now will need a 3 bedroom. So sometime after the first of the year we will be moving and finding a bigger house to accommodate our bigger family. Then we will worry about a crib and bedding and all that jazz. Until then we will settle between a bedside bassinet or a co-sleeper of sorts. I really am against sleeping with a baby in the bed but had a great co-sleeper that attached to the side of the bed for the boys. I am hoping to find something similar.

This time around i will be going the route of a midwife/birthing center instead of a hospital birth. I was very unsatisfied with my hospital births and would very much like to labor in peace and comfort instead of strapped to a hard uncomfortable bed. I do not like the harsh lighting and fast paced doctors and nurses of the hospital.

Now i am not against hospital births. The hospital does there job well and a birthing center isn't for everyone (who knows it may not even be for me). All i know is i have always had a plan as how i wanted my labor and birth to go and the hospitals in my area are not willing to work with that plan.

I would love to have a drug free birth. I think i might like to labor in a birthing pool. Mostly i want to be free to move around and eat. I want to be able to to take pictures and video of my labor and birth. Bottom line is if this is to be my last i want it to be my way not hospital policy way. Does that make sense?

However this also worries me. As a woman who has had 2 hospital births both with epidurals after being administered pictocin i am scared that i can't do it. I am scared that i will get half way through the birth and panic. I am terrified that something will go wrong and they won't be able to get me to the hospital fast enough. I am scared.

I know women have been doing this for as long as we have been in existence but with all the modern technology do the doctors really know beter than nature. I trust my body to do what it is suppose to do naturally with out the drugs and nurses and doctors. It is just scary to think of all the could go wrong.

Alright i think i am done whining/crying/bitching/wishing for today. Hope everyone is having fun at the party and look forward to seeing you all again!

P.S. If you could all being praying for MckMama over at My Charming Kids. Her baby boy Stellen in back in the hospital battling and we are all praying that he is ok. Thanks!


Tonya said...

Well I know how you feel about having nothing for the baby. I got rid of everything after my 3rd and we now have 4 :) I did a lot of borrowing instead of buying as I wasn't going to need the stuff after the 4th was done. I loved the bumbo I borrowed. I had a midwife with the first 3 births and loved them, they were all hospital but I was told by my mom that they made all the difference! My 4th was a c-section otherwise I would of had them all with a midwife. Well it was nice meeting you now that I just wrote a book :) Also you can do it drug free I did...and I lived to tell about it ;)

Sarcastic Mom said...

I know several ladies who were scared to go natural, but they did it, and felt very empowered. Do some research and ask some questions of the birthing centers at your local hospitals and you'll find out if they have birthing pool options and the like. I've also heard it's a great idea to look up a midwife and have them work along with you, even if you birth in a hospital. They'll be your coach and help you set things up to your advantage in the hospital. That way you can have things more naturally, but have the medical teams right there, too, if you need intervention.

I've always thought that if I have another kiddo, that's how I'd want it, too.

Good luck!

Momma said...

With my first I learned that more than half of what I received at my baby shower was unnecessary. lol. I guess we all learn what we will use and what we won't.

crib? it was all set up but not used for over a year. he ended up in our bed to make feeding easier.

stroller? I ended up wearing him in a wrap because I didn't want to be put down and I was so comfortable to have him near.

my necessities have changed from crib to co-sleeper and stroller to wrap. lol

And if you have questions about cloth diapers just let me know. we switched when my first son was 14 months and will never go back! It is soooo much easier than I thought and so much better for those little bums.

JamericanSpice said...

Nice to meet you!

Talk about a party!

I'm quite intrigued and am learning how to get around!

Just stopping by from 5minutes for moms blog party!

Adventures In Babywearing said...

You can do it! I had 2 normal hospital births and then a 3rd in the hospital all natural... then my fourth was born at home! This is also our first time cloth diapering and I LOVE IT!

I've written a lot about the things you speak about here- if you ever have any questions, let me know!


Laura McIntyre said...

Seriously if shipping was not such a bitch i could ship you about 99% of your list. Including crib and bedding lol . You do have ages though to get everything together, i remember hitting around 39 weeks with Ru and thinking $%^t i having nothing ready for this baby.

As for the birth , go for it . Both my girls were born in hospital with epidural and as your know Ru born in the water at home. I was also terrified of getting half way through and not been able to cope anymore but knowing drugs were not an option really did help. I hope you get your dream birth , its a wonderful thing - definitely try the water that is just a wonderful help