These Boys



These boys right here have the uncanny ability to drive me up one wall and down the other.

These boys right here have the ability to make the worst situations better just by smiling.



These boys right here....yes them...they are the reason my world turns.

These boys have my heart. And although they squeeze it a little too hard sometimes; They never abuse it.



The Day After

It is one of my favorite days.

The day after Thanksgiving.

Not because i love football.

Not because i get up at the butt crack of dawn to catch the deals.

Not because i am in a turkey induced coma.

But because it is so calm, so peaceful, and so full of nothing.

I woke up at 8 with the kids and fixed them breakfast. It is cold outside. I mean REALLY cold. It was 73 degrees yesterday and today it hasnt made it to 35.

I settled in on the couch with my babies. The baby went down for a nap. I turned on the WVU/Pitt game.

I looked over and MJ was asleep. I curled up with Phabian on the love seat.

With in minutes our breathing had synced and we were both asleep.

Those moments are why i love the day after. It is a lazy day of love, leftovers, and comfort.

How often do you get to cuddle with you older kids and take a nap in the middle of the day?

It is truly priceless!

Thankful

I am thankful that i have 3 beautiful children.

I am thankful that i have 3 healthy children.

I am thankful that i have a caring, sweet, wonderful husband.

I am thankful that i have a healthy husband.

I am thankful that I am healthy.

I am thankful that we have an income.

I am thankful that we have a roof over our heads.

I am thankful we have clothes on our backs and shoes on our feet.

I am thankful we have a car to get us from place to place and money to put gas in it.

I am thankful we never go to bed hungry.

I am thankful that we are never thirsty.

I am thankful we have all the amenities we can afford.

I am thankful we have extended family who love and care for us.

I am thankful we are loved by so many.

I am thankful that we have another day together.

I am thankful that we have a table to meet around.

I am thankful that God is so gracious and kind.

I am thankful for so much and often so little.

I am thankful for my imperfections because they make me strive to be better.

I am thankful!


What are you thankful for?

Bad Mommy Sunday

So yesterday was not....i repeat NOT a good day.

I had a bad mommy day. Yes i know we all have them but it doesnt make it any less upsetting.

The day started off well enough. the kids and I watched How To Train Your Dragon (super cute if you havent seen it). We ate popcorn for breakfast and cuddled in the recliner.

But somewhere along the lines a migrain made itself known. Sione' was having a super...i repeat SUPER cranky day. The kids feel apart when i ask them to help me clean. And Hubby well he was no help when i was trying to get dinner on the table.

All of this lead to a MMMD (Mini Mommy Melt Down). I screamed and yelled. I threatened. And at the worst of it i threw a dish (not at anyone; i was alone in the kitchen) and smashed it against the wall. I ended up knealing in the kitchen floor praying to God to take this dag blasted headache away, and to please give me patients to finish out the night.

Then after we had ate and the kids laid in bed i went in to kiss them goodnight. They threw their little arms around my neck and told me they loved me. MJ ask if my head still hurt. Phabian kissed me on my forhead and told me it was ok. And hubby fixed me a cup of hot tea.

It should have made me feel better but instead i got a big dose of MMG (Major Mommy Guilt). How could i be so mean to these people who love me so much. Thank God for blessing me so much with a loving family. Thank God these children are built in his light. Quick to forgive and forget. I love them and they love me despite my many flaws.

Thank You God!

Advanced

When i was a kid starting out in school, advanced was a word i heard often. My teachers would say to my mom, "Courtney is really advanced for her age", or "Have you ever thought of advancing her a grade".

When i started Kindergarten, having never attended a preschool, i already knew how to read and do basic math. I could write my name as well as other small words and sentences. Back then (20 years ago) that would have qualified me to go straight to the first grade completely skipping kindergarten.

My Mom refused to advance me. She felt that it was important for me to have that kindergarten year to become accustomed with how school worked since i had never attended a preschool. In other words she wanted me to be socially smart as well as intelligent smart.

I had my problems in kindergarten. I got bored a lot since i already knew a lot of what the other kids were just learning. I was given special assignments to help keep my attention. I was aloud to go to the library and read if they were doing something that i already had mastered. It made me feel a little separate from the other kids, but over all i can not complain about my kindergarten experience.

I had the best kindergarten teacher in the world (and still hold her as my favorite teacher to this day). And the school dealt with me in what i would call a perfect way. They did what they could to help me excel and gave me things to do that both helped my education and my social abilities.

Now 20 years later i am facing a similar problem only in the position of my mother.

Phabian started Kindergarten back in June (year round school). After about 3 months of school we came to realize that he is a little more advanced then the other kids. He is pretty much reading now and writing wonderfully with little help. He can count and do simple math. Socially he is even doing great. I accredit this to his 2 years in preschool with the worlds best pre-k teacher and aid. They however accredit it to me. 

Now as we approach the end of the 2nd semester he is starting to get bored. He is losing focus and getting in trouble a lot. Not anything major but little things that insinuate he is bored with what he is learning. Unlike the school where i attended as a kid, his school is apparently not prepared to deal with this. He is forced to sit through things and grin and bear the outcome of his boredness.

After a parent/teacher conference with his teacher a month ago i confirmed i am not happy with his environment. She pretty much told me that he should have been skipped a grade but it was too late now since we are already half way through the 2nd semester and the 1st grade curriculum would be too advanced. I was a little furious. We have known he was advanced since the year began back in June so why was this option not mentioned to me earlier.

I am not ok with my child constantly getting in trouble because, essentially, he is TOO SMART! How is that teaching him anything? To me it is telling him, " Hey your too smart, so maybe if you weren't smart you wouldn't get in trouble".  To top it off they have a daily grading system. It goes from a Paw (best behavior) to a D (worst behavior). If at the end of the semester they do not have enough Paws that child will not be aloud to attend the field trip planned for that semester. So once again Phabian might lose out on something fun because he is too smart.

Yes i understand he still has to learn to behave and follow instructions. I get that, i promise. But what would be wrong with giving him something more advanced to do if you are working on something that you already know that he knows. If you are working on the letter F and you know he already knows that, why cant you give him a book to read or something else to work on? Is it that hard to give him busy work so that he doesn't get in trouble?

So here is where the big dilemma comes in. I have talked at length with MJ (and Phabian's) pre-k teacher. She knows all about Phabian and the trouble he is having. She suggested to me that i might want to go ahead and have MJ tested to be advanced to 1st grade instead of starting in  kindergarten because he is also showing signs of being very advanced for his age.

I don't want to face the same problems with MJ that we are having with Phabian. MJ is already starting to read. He is learning from his brother and is almost on the same scale as his brother in some things. If i have him tested i don't know if there is a down side. If he passes the test (which i have been told is pretty hard) he will have proved he is smart enough and mature enough to be advanced, if he doesn't then it isn't any skin off anyone. He will just go to kindergarten and no one knows the wiser.

I hesitate because i worry how Phabian will feel about this in the long run. Phabian has always took pride in being the older sibling. He is older in age, he got to play football when MJ wasn't old enough yet. He got to start "real" school first. He gets to do homework. If we do choose to skip MJ a grade he will be right there with his brother. Possibly (even though i doubt it) in the same class. I just don't know how Phabian will feel about that or even how to ask him about it. They attended pre-k together for a year and never had a problem but they are older now and have had a whole year apart in separate classrooms.

So help me out here. I need opinions from everyone. If you know a teacher send her/him over so i can get that opinion too. I am just so confused as to what i should do. Advance MJ or don't? How can i help Phabian? What suggestions would you make if you were in this situation?

Christmas Is Coming

And i am so totally not ready! But i am hoping with the help of 5 Minutes for Mom's Christmas Giveaway 2010 i can get it kicked into gear. As always they are giving away some great gifts. So if you are behind in your shopping and just want a chance to win some great stuff head over to 5 Minutes for Mom and see what you can win.

Dear Husband

Happy Anniversary!

I don't know how it is possible that 6 years has passed. How we have laughed and loved, fought and bickered, kissed and hugged, and created 3 beautiful children in such a short amount of time.

I don't know how i got so lucky and blessed to have God gift me with such a wonderful man.

I thank him everyday for making you for me. For guiding me to you. For guiding you to me. For blessing us both so handsomely with the life we have together.

Six year ago today i married the man of my dreams. You work hard to make sure we are all well taken care of. I know i don't thank you enough for all you do, but i love you and i appreciate it more than you will ever know.

You work yourself til you are so tired you cant stand up. You love your kids more than life itself, and you love me. It is more then i could ever have ask for. Someone sure knew what they were doing when they got us together.

You have so many great qualities but most of all you have the ability to make me laugh. Even when i am so mad i could spit nails you can look at me and i just cant help but laugh. When i am crying you always have the right words to make me smile. When life seems to have gotten the best of the both of us you still somehow manage to crack a joke that can make the world seem brighter. I love that about you, even if i bitch about it sometimes.

I know i am not always the easiest person to live or deal with. I know i bitch too much and praise to little. But i love you. With all my heart and soul i love you. I don't know what i would ever do without you in my life. Who else would ever put up with all my crap. You are truly the love of my life and i can not wait to spend the rest of my life with you.

I love you Marcus. Please never doubt that for a second. Happy Anniversary!

Sione's One Year Slide Show

"Sione' One Year Old"

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Happy 1st Birthday Sione'

Dear Sione',

          Today marks one year of you being in our lives. One whole year since you came into our world and made it that much more joyous. It is hard for Mommy and Daddy to believe that is has been 12 months since i wrote about your birth.

          So much has taken place in the last year. You have grown so much and yet you are still my littlest baby. Mommy and Daddy have so many hopes and dreams for you but we want you most of all to love life and treasure every moment.

          At one you have 7 1/2 teeth. We thought you would never get them. They came in slow and painfully for you. You have no been the best teether but you made for one great cuddler while going through it. You got one at a time and then all of a sudden in October 3 came in at once totaling you to 7. Your little toothy grin with your scrunched up nose is my favorite thing to see first thing in the morning.

          I am not sure how much you weight but my guess would be somewhere between 26 and 28 pounds and you are such a tall little thing. You have your one year appointment on the 15th so we will find out then and i will make a note here later.

          You are oh so active. You enjoy running now. I mean full on, taking off, fly by the seat of your pants running. It is still the waddle run of a baby but fast and cute none the less. You also enjoy hugging and blowing kisses. Your little chubby baby hands waving bye bye is just enough to make and grouch smile.

          You do love your sleep though and are not one to be woken up. You go to bed at 8 with your brothers and wake at 6:30 with them as well. Usually you go back to bed at 8:30 for a morning nap and again at 3 for a short afternoon nap. Soon we will cut that morning one out and change to one nap around noon instead.

          You hair when wet and combed touch the back of your shoulders on your neck, but when aloud to dry natural is curly, curly, curly. It has changed from the dark black of your first 8 months to a dark auburn/brown like Mommy and Phabian's. One thing that hasnt changed is those dark, almost black, eyes and those lush long lashes. I think i have another heart breaker on my hands. Those eyes are dangerous and you know how to use 'em.

           You are curious about everything. Lights, noises, people all have to be investigated with all 5 senses. You are jibbering up a storm now in your own little language that none of us can really understand but love to hear none the less. You can say several words though. Hah Hah (Hot Hot), Dada, Mama, Num Num (Yum Yum), Bye Bye, BaBa (Bottle or Sippy), Buh Buh (Bubby), Na Na (No No), MiMI (Paci which we call Minka) are the most understandable.

           This first year has went by too fast. It has just been one day after another flown by. Good days and bad i wouldnt take back a moment of it. If anything i would go back and slow it all down. You are another gift from God and we cherish you more then you will ever know.

            Happy Birthday to you Sione'. We love you and are so proud and happy with how big you are. And as we enter the next phase of your life i hope you know that everyone is so very proud to have you in their life. We hold you in our hearts and nothing will every change the love we feel for you.

(I will follow with a picture post soon. Didnt wanna make this post a mile long.)

Update On Phabian and Other Randomness

Phabian had his follow up with the Plastic Surgeon yesterday. Honestly he didn't tell us anything we didn't already know. Just a little reassurance that everything looks good and is healing properly. It actually took me longer to fill out all the paper work then it did for him to talk to us. We go back on Tuesday for another check.

Phabian went to school today. I kept him home Wednesday because the school was acting like it was too much of a hassle for him to be there. They said he wasn't focused and his arm was hurting him. Well DUH! He has a 2nd degree burn on his arm. I think i would be crying my eyes out, but not Phabian. He just tells you if it hurts and goes on with what he was doing. Anyways, I let him go today because, well honestly, i needed him to go. I needed the break and since he wasn't in pain (or minimal at least) i told him he needed to go. He was actually excited. He hates, and i mean HATES to miss school.

Tomorrow is Sione's 1st birthday. I am still in shock i think. It hasn't registered that i am no longer the mom of a newborn. He is actually a toddler and in many ways it breaks my heart. This time last year i think i was sitting mad on my couch, swearing that this child would never come out. Today i was one whole day past due and completely done. At the same time i was being patient and knew he would come when he was ready (or at least hoping he would haha).

I am stuck in this hole of emotions. I am excited that my baby is turning 1. I am sad that another year has passed by so fast and that my baby is growing up even faster. I am mourning the fact that i might never get to do this again (by choice of course) and it seems like it went by way too fast. I am dreading the days that i know will only go faster from here. How else do you explain the fact that i have an almost 6 and 5 year old when just a few days ago they were born? But most importantly i am feeling blessed that i have 3 healthy, beautiful children and a loving, supportive, hard working husband.

Time just moves too quickly. There is so much that takes away from enjoying those moments that are so fleeting. You have to work extra hard to capture the memories and enjoy the special moments. I can honestly say that this past year has been amazing. We have struggled, we have had ups and downs, but most of all we have lived, loved, laughed, and enjoyed our family.

And in the end i think that is what truly matters.

Wild, Scary Ride We Call Life

It has been an extremely long and scary weekend. Things went all haywire, time stopped, sped forward, slowed down, and crept at a snail pace.

Lets start with Saturday. For the most part Saturday was normal. For the MOST part.

We got up and went to Saturday morning football practice. After practice they had a birthday party/lunch for all the teams. Anyone who has more then 1 child, or works in a school, church, nursery where you deal with more than one child at a time, knows it is difficult to coordinate anything involving a lot of kids. Well lets say serving lunch to about 120 kids plus 30 adults, in a room built to hold about 50 people, out of a kitchen the size of a bathroom, is not an easy or fun task.

After that was over we headed home to take a little nap. Hubby left for work at 3 as is the norm. The rest of the afternoon went pretty well. But here is where it gets sticky.

My SIL (lets call her C) was hosting a sleep over Saturday night for her son and my kids. The reason for this was because she was watching MJ and Sione' all day Sunday while we were at the Super Bowl games and we didn't want Phabian to feel like he missed out on the fun. Since the buses run funny at night Hubby had to take the car to work with him leaving me no way to get the kids to my SIL's house (her car is in the shop). So we called his niece (lets call her A) and ask if she would mind coming by around 6 and taking the kids to said SIL's house. She said that was fine and all was worked out and well.

At 6 that evening i texted A and ask her is she was still planning to take the kids to C's house. She said yes but she was waiting on her boyfriend to get home. I said ok i was just checking and to call when she was on the way. About 3 seconds later she texts me back and said she didn't know what was going on that C was at Granddad's house. So i said ok let me know whats going on. So i waited. All the while my kids are now screaming and crying because they think they are not going to get to go to the sleepover.

At 7:30 i texted her again. She proceeded to tell me that C was with my BIL (lets call him F) getting her cell phone fixed. Ah so this explains why my 3 calls and 10 texts have not been answered. So A tells me that she is not coming to get the kids. That since F is taking C home he is coming to get the kids. Ok that makes sense to me. So i text F to confirm and see how long it will be.

By now it is 8 and the kids are over the moon howling about how they are late and they are not going to get to go. The baby is exhausted and ready for bed and my temper is teetering on boiling. After texting F he tells me i will have to meet him at the house cause he doesn't have room in his car. I said i do not have a way to meet you there and that A said that she had already confirmed with him that he was coming to get them. He laughed and said ok we will figure it out.

Finally at 8:30 they pick up the kids and i am left home along waiting on Hubby. Breathe a sign of relief!

Fast forward to Sunday morning. We are up way early because we have to get everything ready for the day, pick Phabian up from C's, go pick up a few other people, and be at our home field by 10 to join in the parade to the Super Bowl field.

Hubby had ran to my MIL's house to borrow a few dollars and i was fixing my hair when the phone rang.

This is where time did all the stopping, slowing, speeding, and crawling.

C called in tears to tell me Phabian had spilled boiling water on his arm (i hear his screams of panic and pain in the background) and he needed to go to the ER right away.

TIME STOPS!

In a panic i tell her ok we will be there asap.

TIME IS STILL STOPPED!

I call Hubby at his Mom's and scream at him to get home NOW because Phabian is hurt.

TIME IS CRAWLING!

TIME IS SLOWING EVEN MORE!

Hubby finally gets home i jump in the car and we speed off.

TIME IS STILL CRAWLING!

We pull up at C's house i just out of the car bust in the house. Run up a flight of stairs to find my baby calmly sitting on the bed with a towel wrapped around his arm. I prepare for the worst.

TIME STARTS TO FLY BY

I look at his arm, slowly unwrapping the towel. I don't see bone (ok worst averted), but the skin is all peeling back and my poor baby's skin is red as a fire engine. We rush him to the car and to the ER.

They get him in quick and give him some Ibuprofen for pain. This is where i get to brag about how brave my boy is. They had to cut away the dead skin and put medicine and bandages on his burn. It is a 2nd degree burn we are told and no worse then a really bad sunburn. He didn't even flinch. He laughed and joked with the nurse and doctors all while they cut and bandaged his poor burnt arm. We are released with the instructions that he is not allowed to play int he Super Bowl and to return the following morning for a check up.

We proceed to the football field (still making the parade). He joins his team on the field where they give him a jersey to wear and let him instruct warm ups. He stays with his team and cheers them on from the sidelines. I am so proud of my boy. They lost 32 to 14 but still held their heads high as they accepted their 2nd place trophies.

The day was long and dragged out. We were at the football field from 11am to 7pm. By the time we picked up MJ and Sione' got some food and got home all we had energy to do was pass out.

Monday morning we got up and get MJ to school and Sione' to my MIL's. Then headed to the ER for our check up. Once again they got us in and out with instructions to change the bandage 2 - 3 times a day and follow up with a plastic surgeon in 2 - 5 days.

So that was our weekend. It was long, scary, sad, and hard. I hope to never have another weekend like that again. Changing Phabian's bandage last night was hard. the nerves are getting feeling back and it hurt him so much. I cried with him as i washed and rebandaged his burn. this morning wasn't as bad as it is starting to scab over and try to heal.

It is going to be a long recovery but hopefully in the end it will heal well and all will be ok. Just keep my baby in your prayers. He is a brave brave boy.

Would You Rather....

Since i don't really have a lot to write about today i figured i would answer the prompt for today.

Would you rather be wealthy and ugly, wise and sickly, or beautiful and stupid?


In order to really answer this i guess you have to think out all the options so lets give it a go.

If you were beautiful, some would say, that it doesn't matter if you are stupid. You would be afforded opportunities that could make you rich, popular, loved (all be it for the wrong reasons maybe), and happy (in theory i guess). Being stupid however isn't a fixable thing. I guess some would say it is. But if you are truly stupid then that would mean you lack the ability to learn and grow there for leaving you always stupid. Doesn't sound very appealing to me. Beauty can be bought and stupidity just isn't acceptable to me.

To be wise is a wonderful attribute. Wise people are often wealthy in all the ways that truly matter. Love, culture, education, faith, family, friends, and work. They however can also push others away with their know-it-all attitude and obsession with gaining more knowledge. To be sickly, which i would assume means either a disability or disease, would be a hard thing to deal with for anyone no matter your situation or intelligence. I suppose when combined with being wise it would give you a goal to work towards though. You could put your intelligence to use to find a cure or build new machinery to help those with disabilities.

Wealth is measured in different things but for the purpose of the question i will assume you are referring to money-wealth. Money is a great thing to have. It can reduce stress for someone in a tight situation and help someone who really needs it. It can be used to help foundations find cures or help the less fortunate. However wealth is not always the answer. With money comes power and with power comes often a big head. To think one is all powerful is truly sad. Money and power can not always get you everything you want. Ugly...what is there to say about ugly. Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder i suppose. So to be ugly would only be the opinion of those who see you as ugly but to those who see you as beautiful, well you get the point.

I don't know if i really would want to be a combo of any of these. I think there are ups and downs to all of them. If i had to choose i think i would have to pick wise and sickly because if you are truly wise i would think you would be able to know what to do with your wiseness.

What would you pick?

Sick...Ugh

Phabian made it all the way to school today just for them to call us and tell us he needed to come home. He isn't running a fever or anything. Just vomit, diariah, and an upset tummy. maybe it is just a 24 hr bug. I pray that it is just that.

He has been laying on the couch since he got home a few hours ago. He seems to be feeling better already but who knows. As long as he is resting and drinking lots of fluids i suppose he will be alright. He wont be able to make football practice tonight and i hate that for him since this is the last week.

Oh yea did i mention that his team made it to the Super Bowl!!!! Go Generals!!!! I am so proud of my boy. This was his first year playing and he is just so excited about the championship. So i pray he is better by Sunday at least for he will be able to make the game.

So not much else to report here. Phabian - sick, Sione' - teething, MJ - brat (just kidding) (not really).

Hope you are all having a very blessed day.

Lord of the...I Don't Get It

The other day i was over at my MIL's house and was telling her how i have kinda ran out of books to read. Until i have some money to go out and get some i just am stuck.

her being the great person she is told me she had a stack of books on the porch and to take what ever sounded interesting. I rummaged through and found Lord of the Flies.

I knew nothing about it other than it is a classic and suppose to be good, so i decided what the hay i will give it a go. Well that was just a great idea right.

Now to preface this, i consider myself a smart person. I read a lot. A lot of different types of books. I have read about 100 books just this year. All ranging from far out fiction to true stories. But i do not get Lord of the Flies.

Maybe it is the words from a time and place that i dont really understand. Maybe if it was written in all English(USA) then i might get it more. I dont really know what it is but it is just making me feel really dumb.

I like the plot well enough and i have been told to just hang in there and it does get good, but it is only a little over 200 pages long and i am more than half way through. When does it get better?

I guess i will just have to finish it and then see what my overall opinion is. At least i am reading and i guess that is what truly counts. i am showing my kids that reading is fun and enjoyable. And they will hopefully follow in my footsteps and become great lovers of books.

A Day Late and a Dollar Short

So once again i am late as usual but hey its my life i can be late if i want to right?

I have been lagging on posting regularly and was really trying to figure out how to get back in the habit when i got my monthly Nablopomo Newsletter.

This is something i participated in when i first started this blog so that i could get in the habit of positing on a regular basis. So i figured what worked before might work again.

So i am a day late starting which really isn't a big deal since i don't much care about the prizes and such. (ok i do care about the prizes but it is easier to say i don't care since i am a day late lol). This is just about getting back to my enjoyment of typing away in my very own corner of the world wide web.

So here is to November and posting everyday (except the 1st). I will guarantee you now that not every post will even be worth reading. My life is just not that interesting people. But none the less you will get something everyday from me as long as i remember.

Hope you are having a fab Tuesday and if your in the US have a fun time voting.