My Dear Sweet Phabian

So it has been a ruff week for my big boy Phabian. He has been having a hard time with school. I think it is caused by the fact that they go year round. They go for 9 weeks at a time and are out for 3 weeks at a time. Now i know they say this is an attempt to help kids remember more and forget less but it is very confusing for a child at age 3. I think he went for the first 2 weeks then they left on break and he thought,"ok i went to school its done now". Oh my poor child if you had only know that your excitement about school needed to last about another 20 years.

It all started the 4th day back from break. It was a normal Friday as always. They were learning about the letter F and playing outside as long as the good weather lasted. He threw a rock while they were outside playing. Now every Friday they get (if they have been good all week) a treasure out of the treasure box. This so called box contains both toys and candy. Because he threw the rock he didn't get any treasure. He was so upset and cried. The next school day he seemed fine, but lone an behold when we went to pick him up he was crying. They had been learning about Fire Safety and they used a puppet. Well apparently one of the other kids was playing with it and made a gesture at Phabian like the puppet was going to get him. He was petrified. Now it is a fight every morning. When we approach the school he starts in with i don't wanna go. Then once we get inside he screams bloody murder. When we pick him up the report is always the same,"He cried for a few minutes and then he was fine".

Now this is very hard for both of us. As a mommy i want to run back in and grab him and hold him till he is ok, or run home with him in my arms. I hate that he is sad. It is the policy of the school that you allow your kids to get through these times by leaving them there and allowing them to gain trust in the teacher by allowing her to console him. I wouldn't have a problem with this if i didn't feel like he is somehow losing trust in me. I feel like i am the one who is suppose to help him through this and i am the one who is suppose to console him. It is frustrating. He is doing better though. Day by day the time that he cries is getting less and less. Yesterday it was 2 minutes and today it was only 1 and he is no longer in tears when we pick him up either. I hope it passes soon. He is such a big boy and i just don't want him to feel like mommy has somehow abandoned him to fend for himself.

So i guess that is my rant for today. My big boy is getting to big and growing even faster now. Each day that passes i see my first born growing into a well mannered, intelligent, all be it rowdy young man. Soon he will be playing little league sports and i will be cheering him on in the stands. Soon he will move from the comfort of his small school with 12 students to a big school with lots of kids. My baby is growing and all i can do is sit here and wonder where the heck time went to and why i didn't notice it was flying by.

Oh yes and Phabian's word of the month: Steep (ie: "Mama we can't climb that hill cause it's steep!!!")

and some pictures to end with.

Silly Face

Pout Face

Happy Face

Surprised Face

My Morning So Far

OK i know that sounds great right. Its only 9am here and i have already had a rather exciting if not aggravating morning. Lets start from the beginning.

At 5am i woke up to Phabian kicking me in my back. At some point during the night (and this is every night) Phabian crawled in the bed with me and my husband got up and went to sleep on the couch. Then i woke up at 6am with one kid on each side of me leaving me a small space in the middle of the bed to try and sleep for the remainder of what should have been 2 hours (since my kids normally get up about 8 when they are in bed with me and hubby is at work). This plan must have not been in the stars. At 6:45am i hear Phabian screaming and crying and i hear my husband lay him back down in our room with our peacefully sleeping (MJ) son. Phabian proceeds to cry for the next 15 mins (all because he wanted some milk and daddy wouldn't get up to get him some even though he would have went right back to sleep if he would have just given him the milk)(not to mention hubby had to be at work at 8 anyways so he needed to get up). So i fly out of bed after it finally wakes me and MJ up and get them both some milk. I was pissed. He could have just got his lazy ass up and fixed the milk. Phabian would have crawled back in bed with me and MJ and went right back to sleep til 8 or so. Needless to say in my cranky half asleep manor i yelled at my husband. I instantly felt bad not because i yelled at him but because the kids saw me yell at him so i went an apologized so the kids would see the right thing to do.

So as if that wasn't bad enough this was the rest of my morning:

Phabian: Mommy i have to poop!

Me: Well then go to the bathroom baby.

Phabian: I can't the door is locked!

Me: No it's not Phabian it is just stuck, pull harder. (sometimes our door gets stuck at the top)

Phabian: No mommy it's locked.

So i proceed to go over and try and turn the knob. Sure enough he had locked it from the inside and then shut the door behind him when he came out this morning. So this is what it looked like.

Not fun to do at 8:30 in the morning when you were already mad.

On top of it all MJ is in a mood this morning. I took the sheets off of their beds (which they only sleep in for a matter of maybe 6 hrs a night before they are in bed with us) to wash them and MJ threw a fit. He screamed, cried, and threw himself on the bed. When i tried to calm him down he backed into the corner and told me to get away. I then saw a beautiful opportunity to Photography his mood which on camera looks kinda sad but he really was mad.

I just wanna go back to bed...hopefully nap time will come early today!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!